today was quite fun i suppose. we just played cards all the way till our recess break, followed by math lesson *blink* but we had an enjoyable time watching a group go some forfeit. they attempted to murder us with their "baa baa black sheep" lol! then it was operation clean-up, whereby we just clean up our classrooms. so for a while i was wondering.. why isn't there music (like there always is). suddenly i heard a familiar tune. same old brand new you!! kay, this song has a long history. it was the song that made me a power98 listener. and i've been a listener for THREE years. *grin* so my group of friends at the back sitting near me were singing along, (i was too!) and we were scrubbing our tables and chairs. then i made a comment which in turn made my friends laugh. *blink* i said, while they wash cars in the mtv, we wash our chairs. lol. hmm..

anyway, been snapping around, trying to get the pics all uploaded, but it'd take time ;)

bah whatever. TKGS 2E6 2003 ROCKS THE WORLD =)
:: sh 2:20:00 AM [+] ::
...

sigh. i totally wished we could spend the whole day at school today since it was the last day. yet i wouldn't want the day to end. *sigh* this marks the last day of tkgs 2e6, 2003, officially. i could've cried. i'm gonna miss my friends if i opt for lit elect. cos apparently doesn't seem like anyone's gonna join me. damn it.

anyway, i'm pretty satisfied with the results, i s'pose..
eng - b3
higher chinese - a2
maths - a1
science - a1
geog - a2
history - b4 (LOL. no way am i gona take history *nod*)
literature - b3
d&t - a1
home ec - a2 (lol, nope i didn't burn down the kitchen!)
art - a1

total: 666/990
percentage - 74%
class position - 7/39
level position - 32/353

*bounce* i got 32nd!!!! aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! lolz. so. should i take literature elective or geography elective? dammit i hate to have to choose. i'm like lit a lot. think my future job'd be eng-base... and i enjoy it better. like to study it better. but... i score better in geog, and most of my friends are opting for geog, and my bro's studied geog b4 so he could help me... yet... AAARRGGGHHHH!!!!! *dilemma*
:: sh 11:55:00 PM [+] ::
...

my dear classmate's got a blog! whee! it's here and she told me she likes the way i write. awwh, bless! *grin* it IS the first time someone's told me that. heh. ;) *satisfied smile*

heh heh, i thought my class was hilarious today. during math, our teacher HAD to continue with the unfinished syllabus to aid next year's math syllabus, and obviously, we were all rather reluctant to have lessons, especially when it's right after some major exams and we just recovered from the shock (the results). No way did we want to study MATH. *blink* it was funny, cos our teacher asked if we had graph paper, and we were like, "no, we don't. nope no graph paper..." etc. then she gave a snicker and said, "nevermind, i got." then she took out a stack of 'em. and we went, "no, don't waste your graph papers, it's okay..." *grin* but she said that she's always been wasting stuff on us, so it's fine. *growl* then while she passed the papers to us, my friends shouted out, "teacher ah, i didn't bring ruler..", "I don't have pencil!", "my pencil no lead!", "no pen leh, how?" etc. lol! nice try my dears. we had to do it all the same, though. mutter.

anyway, quite satisfied with my overall average. 73 *grin* didn't expect it to reach over 70. *smiles* then again, highest was 77. it may not seem that far, but considering it's an average over 9 subjects, 4X9 is 36. I was away from 'em by 36 marks! *blink* okay. let's not think about that. heh. :) i'm dying to know my position though. hopefully it maintains the 6th position or improves, though it's seemingly an unrealistic goal now. sigh. *keeps fingers crossed*

ps: been sketching garfield lately. *grin* quite proud with my first attempt. it's so cute! should try to get it scanned some day. ;)

pps: does everyone have a problem with "whatever."? hmm.
:: sh 1:46:00 AM [+] ::
...

ah, i met the nicest cab driver u can meet, ever.

before that, played badminton with my friends from 11.15 to about 2.30... ;) actually we booked it from 11.30 to 1.30, but no1 came, so we just took the advantage. hell tiring. :p but still enjoyable. then we head on to KFC at eastpoint for lunch. gawd, the stuff i ate, was enough to give my dentist fits! well, thankfully she didn't. perhaps the gargling helped. =)

anyway, had my dental appointment today at 4, and i left eastpoint at 3.30, thinking i'd make it on time. thus, i took the train to tanah merah, took bus 14. hey, i ain't familiar with that bus okay? apparently i took the wrong bus. lol. i took the one towards bedok. so i ended up at bedok interchange. *blink* it was already 4, by then. so i was like, what the crap, so i just went to the main road, hoping a cab would save me. i'm running out of time here! then this cab driver saw me across the road and made a u-turn. then, he was asking me which way i wanted to go, as i was given 2 options. i just told him the fastest way, because i was in a hurry. so he was like, oh? in a hurry? so he stepped on the pedal, and was driving a bit faster, and i told him i'm having a dental appointment, and he was shocked when i said it was at 4, so he drove faster, getting a bit annoyed whenever the car in front was driving slowly. *giggle* then it just wasn't my day i suppose. it felt like there was never-ending traffic lights, and they were all red whenever we were approaching! the fella got a bit irritated too, and was like laughing and telling me, the lights weren't in favour of us. anyway, because i paid $10, for our lunch, (it cost $21! Lol), and was only left with $4, and $50-note, i was rather worried because the meter was ticking away and it was already 3-buck plus, and we weren't very much close yet. when it was there, it was past $4, and i was asking him if he had change, and he just nicely asked how much i had, i told him i only had a 50-buck note and $4, and he was telling me i could just pay him $4, and no worries about it. awwh, have u met a nicer driver?! i was like thanking him throughout, and just smiled and stuff, and told me to take care, and have a nice day and stuffs, when i alighted. goodness. shoot. i should've taken down the cab number!
:: sh 3:38:00 AM [+] ::
...

gah. today's badminton inter-class was bad. very bad. considering we only won one round out of six, we were so thrashed. totally. i was sooo nervous i was still shaking when my game was over. *shudder* like literally, shaking. *nod* bah. scary.

anyway, was watching cinderella yesterday on disney channel, the one with brandy, feels so... ah... i wish i was in a fairy tale. you just meet a guy, sing and dance the whole night long, and live happily ever after. i wish i had a fairy godmother! ah, simple life u're gonna live.

gah. anyway, wheeeeee no school tomorrow. gonna have my last milk tooth extracted. *ahem* no longer a baby! whee =p oops. not supposed to really rejoice bout this, but anyway. ;)
:: sh 5:35:00 AM [+] ::
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childish for the weekend
bah. forgot to mention a part of yesterday's highlights. :p the last part of flag day, i was so tired, i just went to this salesguy and asked him if he could donate, and he told me to hang on, cos he didn't have his wallet with him. then, after he donated, this kid went up to him and asked for a balloon, then i demanded for one too. *laughs* my friend too. it got quite hilarious when we went everywhere with the balloon. (thank goodness that "cute" guy didn't see. how embarrassing.) on the mrt home (from dhoby ghaut to tampines) and the bus ride (from the interchange to my house). out of nowhere, this two girls dressed in obvious full green uniform holding onto a balloon sticking out in the air above their heads. *blink* well, hey i liked balloons and i haven't held one since... lower primary! at the interchange, adults gave us weird stares, kids gave us envious looks. *laughs* felt like a total idiot. but then again, hey, this balloon travelled from orchard, and it's MINE. *grin*

p/s: that "cute" guy was just plain nice and quite cute kay. and melvin made this huge thing as though i've fallen for him. gawd, i think many guys are actually cute. :)

anyway, just now, i went to the library to borrow some books (ooh, i borrowed this fitness book. hopefully it succeeds in keeping me in shape. lol
*ahem* wrong focus. anyway, there was this halloween treats thing, whereby you borrow 4 books, and on the receipt, you'd get a password (mine was "Black cats or bats" (?!)) and you were to recite it to the lady at the service counter and you'd get your treats. *lol* so, curiosity had the better of me, and i found out, the treats were just a couple of sweets. *blink* well, not a bad thing. lol. quite contented with it. heh. and my brother's jealous. *chuckle* he said, "so no need to give me lah? HUH?!" whahaha *rolls on the floor laughing*

anyway, off to watch tv!
:: sh 1:53:00 AM [+] ::
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gah. i'm dead beat. totally. had flag day from 8am-1pm, followed by badminton from 3-4pm. so imagine. tampines to dhoby ghaut, walk to orchard, then to dhoby ghaut for a supposed break, then back to orchard, then back to dhoby ghaut, then to tampines, then out to bedok, then back to tampines. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

but then again, every flag day equals a nice encounter. :p true 'nuff. met this quite cute guy, whom I approached, and he was really nice. i asked if he'd like to donate, so he was like, "oh sure! why not!" then he asked what it was for... so i explained, teen challenge's an organisation for teen drug rehabilitation (gawd, i had a hard time pronouncing this!) and blah. and he asked how much he needed to donate, after taking out quite a number of coins. i told him he could donate any amount. any amount would do. so he smiled and took out his wallet and took out a $2-note. and he went, "okay, i'll give you a 2... and some silver(coins) too!" then i was grinning away, thanking him, wishing him a nice day ahead, and gave him a sticker and he smiled and walked off. a couple of mins later, he walked past and spotted me again, and recognised me so he grinned and i tried to give him my nicest smile. ahhahaaa *cough*

*ahem* anyway, i did some statistics counting... estimate some stuff.. for those who donated,
a. 50% were female, 40% were male, 10% were families.
b. 20% donated, 5% stared at the tin, 75% don't bother to find out who they're helping.
c. 20% donated $2-notes, 50% donated $1, 15% donated all the coins they have, 1 person donated 10-bucks!, the rest donated 10-cents, 20-cents etc...
d. 85% were approached, 15% came up on their own accord. :)

of those who didn't donate, 40% ignored me, 30% smiled and said no, 20% did weird things like nodding (hello? u didn't donate my dear, what're ya nodding about?) and some dude even said thanks. (*blink* thanks what?)

gah. im still dead tired. lol
:: sh 5:44:00 AM [+] ::
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bah. was reminiscing how many layouts i've had. this is officially my 16th!

from annabelle.blogspot.com to this, i've had 16 layouts?!! wha. :p they're...
(not in order)

3 from blogger's templates -> erm bluey one (like this); very colourful one (i remembered it being quite similar to lianne's then.) (like this; another very bluey one (like this).

then,
4 - toes (something about my toes miss your toes, just an image of a few feet as the background)
5 - eminem (lose yourself thingie)
6 - penny for your thoughts, dollar for your dreams (pic of bottle filled with coins by the side)
7 - innocence (pic of 2 innocent kids on the top)
8 - the girl is blue (just this picture of a girl, almost everything's blue)
9 - i miss you (like here
10 - surfin' usa (the one with tons of surfing pics by the side, i made)
11 - black & pink (black background, pink words, i made)
12 - msg in a bottle (background's the seashore, with a glass bottle with a note in it)
13 - FRIENDS (pic of the cast of friends)
14 - oh ashton (ashton kutcher by the side, purple background)
15 - michelle branch's are you happy now (prev one, brown layout, pics of michelle branch on top)
16 - butterflies in my stomach! =)
:: sh 1:37:00 AM [+] ::
...

ESFP - "Entertainer". Radiates attractive warmth and optimism. Smooth, witty, charming, clever. Fun to be with. Very generous. 8.5% of the total population.

Take Free Myers-Briggs Personality Test

:: sh 12:58:00 AM [+] ::
...

Conscious self	Overall self

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

:: sh 12:53:00 AM [+] ::
...

Daily Double
1. When was the last time you cried?
hmmm, i think it was when i watched Princess Diaries on disney channel. sorrrrrry but, the speech is sooooo sad. *sniffle* oh, the other night i nearly had to cry myself to sleep, but i can't quite remember why. think i was feeling alone for some reasons. *ahem* not stated for sympathy, thanks.

2. Do you like to eat hamburgers?
oh yeah!! cheeseburger all the way, baby. chicken, fish, beef, all work for me. :p


suddenly i thought of making a... list for my achievements of the year. this year, i...
1. went to a first heeeeuge event (MAAs)
2. saw utt/denise/kelly clarkson for the first time
3. skipped lessons deliberately for the first time. (for MAA!)
4. slept in class for the first time.
5. became much much much MUCH closer to audrey+elise. :p finally have gd frens from class.
6. got top10 in class for the first time in secondary school.
7. took part in sports tournaments (the last time was either pri 4 or 5! i'm no sportie kid!)
8. actually felt STRESSED.
9. went out with a lot of people for the first time
10. seriously thought of getting a job for the first time.
11. had $80++ as hp bills. first time once again.

can't think of anymore... shall continue nxt time. :p
:: sh 6:49:00 AM [+] ::
...

bah. forgot to mention the other results... or rather, couldn't be bothered to :p erm, maths: 80 (oh c'mon. i was dead confident for this.) science: 78 (ah, surprising. lol) literature: 48/80 (kay, i wasn't happy about this, but considering it's the prolly 6th or 7th score in my class, kay fine.) and d&t: 51/60! whee. :p now, i like that! hahaa. wonder if i could maintain the top10 position in my class. *prays*

anyway, it just sent goosebumps down my spine to think that my class only has one last week to spend together. i'm dead worried. i don't quite like anyone else outside my class, honestly. there isn't many whom i like more than anyone in my class. what am i gonna do!!! you can call me un-socialable, but i've only been sticking to my grp of friends. (audrey + elise, i'm soooooooo gonna miss y'all if we don't end up in the same class.) but the prob is, none of them seem to be wanting my combi... *sniffle* what am i gonna doooo?

there doesn't seem to be any moments by which i'm with them and i don't laugh. it's almost impossible. they're hilarious. audrey's a bit quiet in class, but when she's with us lot, she's equally noisy. lol. not that it's a bad point though. she always thinks we're mad at her, and does really funny expressions. she's like a clone of me, apart from those funny expressions which i simply cannot mimick. she's the exact same height as me, and doesn't like jap food, and we get similar marks for most stuffz. we sit beside each other during all classes. lol.

elise is the smartiepie, who sits totally the other side of the class. she's damn smart, travelled to many parts of the world before, and she has a very short wishlist, but they're all hell expensive. like a telescope, a new computer, a keyboard. *blink* she's verrrrrry into tv stuff (while i'm in to music stuff), and she knows a lot of actors i don't know. hell good at drawing, never runs out of things to say, and is a POP! :p (prefect on probation). hahahaa i chose not to be in it. :p *phew*

anyway we're currently calling each other by pronouncing our initials as a word, which is bloody hilarious, and just yesterday, we started speaking in elizabethan language. *laughs* and yesterday, we also came out with this harry potter clan (they're both huge fans of HP!), whereby elise is hermione, the smartass, audrey is ron (though she reeeeally wants to be harry lol!), the funny chap with silly actions. :p and me as harry potter. brave one, according to them. WELL, i don't know about that. :p but it was funny!

bah. i'm gonna try very hard to make the best out of the last week of school. p/s: we're all in badminton inter-class tournament, which's on monday!! lol, first time we're all in it together. *grin* and we're against the 2 classes which are the best sports class. so we're kinda dead, but it's okay. hahaha...

i'm so gonna miss u lot, if u don't end up with me!

p/p/s: it's not gonna be the same without the lot of friends who are dropping out of tkgs. *sniffle*
:: sh 4:25:00 AM [+] ::
...

wokays, i think i put on another kg cos i've been munching on tons of kitkat! =p lol whoopsie daisie! heh.

anyway, got back history ca, english + chinese EOYs (end-of-year) today. *blink* history i had 12/18, but if i take the other CAs into consideration i'd only have 64 which is a real sad B4.
English's compre was bad. very bad. the summary was rather surprising. was one of the 3 or 4 people of the whole cohort to score a full 10 for the contents. *grin* the compo, i crapped about some singing competition and had a surprising 24/30. i think if other teachers were to mark it, i'd probably have failed. lol. anyway, this guy teacher in my school who's got a PhD in literature was a damn strict marker. thank god i didn't pick the qn he marked. his vocab is bloody wide. erm what the hell? he was like ranting on about the mistakes he encountered and some words caught my attention. "succinctly", "colloquialism" *blink* there were more but i can't remember now. lol
as for chinese, once again, i did better for chinese than english. now, don't look so shocked. :P for chinese compo, i had the potential of getting amongst the highest score, but i was marked down for wrong words. i mean, i didn't know how to write them. bloody higher chinese deprived us from referring to the dictionary. *growl* the main paper was quite cool. 73/90. *grin* it's the 2nd highest score, though prolly 4 people got the same as me. *grin* then again, i'm so glad i wasn't the last, or 2nd last, like i was, usually. whee!

so, all in all, i did much better than i usually do, and i'm -quite- happy about the improvement, but the score could've been better. english overall, i've got like 69.5%. almost died. *blink* couldn't i just get a half mark somewhere?! *grumble* for chinese i had a 71%, so i'm fine with it. ah well. tomorrow we'd be getting back science + literature. ah god damn it. the science paper was very bad. wish me luck! *prays*

p/s: oh whee. my fren bugged the sports capt to select me for the badminton tournament. earlier, she just said, "yay!! i wanna play doubles...with you!" awwh *touched* so sweet. we played as a team the last time round and we rawk. lol. :p well, hopefully. :p

p/p/s: my granny was ranting about me not helping my mum to fold those towels. *blink* she said when she was 14, she was helping HER mum to sew! erm, i'm not gonna pretend to be materialistic and start saying something about breaking my nails, but HELLO?! the only time i sew is during home economics, which i won't have anymore. :p lol

note: flag day this saturday at orchard from 8am-1pm. :P
:: sh 3:43:00 AM [+] ::
...

wokay, think my mum cooled off. finally *phew* i owe it to my aunt who made her laugh upon some joke with my tkgs doll. *grin* i love it.

ah, my cousin gave me the biggest surprise!! she came down and gave me clay's cd with a ribbon. my belated birthday present. i was SO surprised, i only could manage a big hug. *sniffle* she's soooo sweet. i love it to bits!!!!! ahhhhhhhh thanks dear *hugs u* =)
:: sh 6:38:00 AM [+] ::
...

his album was so hard to resist either, but i kept my wallet closed, cos if i spend on this cd yesterday after buying that pair of jeans, i'd be burning a hole in my pocket. fine, i'll save up longer. *mutter*

i'm smitten with this song!

Clay Aiken - Measure Of A Man
courtesy of www.clayaiken.com.sg

Ooh... oo-ooh
If one day you discover him
broken down he's lost everything
no cars, no fancy clothes to make him who he's not
the woman at his side is all that he has got

Why do you ask him move heaven and earth
To prove his love has worth
Would he walk on water
Would he run through fire
Would he stand before you
When it's down to the wire
Would he give his life up
To be all he can
Is that, is that, is that
How you measure a man

If by chance all he has to give you
Was three words wrapped around your finger
Would that be deep enough at the end of everyday
and how will you ever know if a man is what he says

Why do you ask him move heaven and earth
To prove his love has worth
Would he walk on water
Would he run through fire
Would he stand before you
When it's down to the wire
Would he give his life up
To be all he can
Is that, is that, is that
How you measure a man

He'd never give up
Let go of his dreams
his world goes around
for his one true belief
Is that how you know
Is that what it means

He yeah...Would he walk on water
Would he run through fire
Would he stand before you
Will he be your anchor when a dark unfolds
Will he always love you the best that he knows
Would he give his life up
To be all he can
Is that, is that, is that
How you measure a man

Would he walk on water
Would he run through fire
Would he stand before you
When it's down to the wire
Would he give his life up
To be all he can
Is that, is that, is that
How you measure... oh whoa
Is that, is that, is that
How you measure a man
:: sh 8:07:00 PM [+] ::
...

Yesterday was one helluva day. Woke up in the morning, feeling terrible. neck was aching, arms were aching, legs were aching. and yup! shopping day! *grin* we went to citylink + suntec, played around at the fountain of wealth, had lunch at N.Y.D.C. *blink* yes we were being psychotic kay? anyway got myself a pair of jeans, and she got pants, almost predictably. *giggle* oh, oh and got myself a Mrs Fields' triple chocolate cookie. it was quite unresistable, u see. couldn't help it. *nod* walked around, tried on everything and all that, i was dead tired by the time i reached home yesterday. surprisingly managed to last through the man u vs leeds match, and the constant switching between arsenal vs chelsea, and liverpool vs portsmouth matches. then i just flopped onto my bed, and zzzzz. didn't have to attempt to sing any lullaby to make myself go to sleep. wow! ;p

today's a bad day. my mum's mad at me, and the way she's reacting is making me mad too. so, she just went to my grand-dad's place. just as well, for her to cool off anyway. gee.
:: sh 8:00:00 PM [+] ::
...

Daily Double
1. What makes you frustrated?
hmm let's see. when i just blogged a lot, and listed what frustrates me and the comp hangs. *glare* now THAT is frustrating. lol. erm anyway, basically... bad results... when people stood me up... when i'm being made to wait an awful long while.. when i have no freedom.. when i'm wrongly accused... etc. i get frustrated quite easily actually..

2. How long are your blogs usually?
erm. it differs i guess. if it's a fun-filled day or a day with full of emotions, it'd be reeeeal long. otherwise, it could be as short as "i'm bored". lol

anyway, it was quite a tiring day...we (me, audrey, elise + jiawei) played badminton, had lunch at BK at Eastpoint, shopped a little, went to audrey's place to watch Lizzie McGuire the Movie (hey we like her kay. *chuckle* but it was quite nice. *does a cheer gesture* gordo! gordo! gordo! lol), played around with her musical instruments (her house has EVERYTHING. *blink* piano, guitar, violin.) then we went to her gym (kay i shan't mention the embarrassing part about the carpark. i made a fool out of myself in front of her parents, sister, AND the security guard. *hides face*), played a little of table tennis, totally worked out after that. treadmill and all the other equipments... it was insane. i came home, straight away checked my weight... I LOST 2 KG! *bounce* muah you all! we're so gonna do this again. *grin*

whee. shopping tomorrow! *sparkle*
:: sh 6:23:00 AM [+] ::
...

Halfway through the next song, "Supreme", a tiny figure dodges round the back black curtain and races across the stage towards the star. The band and audience hardly see him, he's running so fast. For a moment, Fil think it's Mick, dashing on to make some adjustment on the drum dais; then, horrified, he realises it's not. For the stranger, reaching Rob, plants both palms firmly on the back of his damp black shirt and pushes him forward, right off the front of the stage.
Rob's still holding his radio mike as he falls, tumbling over the shaved head of a shocked security guard as he crashes the five feet down into the black pit below, his assailant on top of him. Diana Scrimgeour, a London rock photograhpher who has been shooting close-ups of Rob, drops her camera as she leaps to one side. She sees Rob's silhouetted arm as he comes over, the twisted, manic, 'really screwed-up' look on the stranger's face behind.
"He's just been attacked!" shouts Liz over the cans. There's a delayed gasp from the huge crowd, as waving hands fall rapiedly to shocked sides. As the music stops, a mass chatter fills the area. What now? Is that it? Up on stage the band members confers earnestly with each other.
For a few seconds Rob is no more than a black, sprawled heap on the floor. The security guards have dragged up the attacker and got his hands behind his back. Rob is already stirring, pulling himself into a crouch, now calling for his radio mike. David Enthoven has already jumped down and picked it up. Rob's acting almost on autopilot, but he's not going to be deterred, he's not going to call the show off - as he might have done before. He's going to get back there and finish his set. Helped by Jonah and a local security guard, Rob remounts the stage. David passes him the mike; Rob's bursting with adrenalin, he realises. Guy has now started the music, but Rob stops him with a brusque 'cut' gesture. He turns back to the crowd.
"Is everybody OK?" Rob shouts to the waiting crowd. "Yeah," they reassure him. "Well, so am I," he yells back. "And I'm not going to let any f***er get on stage and stop you having a good time."
There is huge applause.
"He's very shaked," observes Alistair over the cans. "I can tell from here. Body language. To bits."
"I think Rob might be off for a little while, actually," says Liz, at the first break, after 'Kids'. "Either that or race back on, bollock through it and cut straight to 'Rock DJ'."
Which is what he does. He storms through his remaining numbers without a second break, ending with a 'Rock DJ' that's the most energised there's yet been, an adrenalin-fuelled stormer. Then he's off and down the cloth tunnel into backstage, before anyone can say anything to him. Everyone troops after him, documentary camera crew and all. "Ok, I want everyone in here, please," he says. He's fine, he tells them, as they crowd into his dressing room. They're not to worry. He's not going to milk the pity vibe. "Someone pushed me off stage. It's OK. All right. Ok, cool." Everyone claps.

Rob's dressing-room door is now closed. Manager David stands guard outside it, with the shaken-looking security guards a few yards down the corridor in a cluster. Now wardrobe mistress Flo goes in alone to minister to him. She rubs arnica tincture on his knee, giveshim arnica pellets for the shock and offers something surely rarer in this ever-public circus: the love and support of a trusted employee in private. David and Josie are allowed in and Rob's brave front collapses. "I got back on stage and I finished the gig," he tells them. "I couldn't ruin the show for everybody else that was out there. Because, in the past, I've had stuff thrown at me, like bottles that have hit me in the air and stuff like that and I've just walked off stage and I've not come back on. And I didn't that time, I stayed on till the end." His voice cracks as he looks up. "I don't know, man. It just throws loads of things like, is this worth it? You know, cos that guy stuck that knife in Monica Seles's back. He could have had a knife then. Could have had anything. I don't want to mope into the self-pity of it all or..." His voice suddenly breaks. "But I'm scared. I'm genuinely scared," he repeats, his eyes glistening with tears. "And it's not just tonight I'm scared, d'you know what I mean, it's a huge percentage of my days I'm really, really scared."
John Lennon, George Harrison, Jill Dando, Brad Pitt. The fear has haunted him, night after night, alone in his bedroom in Kensington Park Road, has finally become reality. Thank God it wasn't worse.
Next door, everyone is hyped and shocked and excited.
"it was like slow motion," Fil is saying. "I thought, Christ, Mick's moving quick..."
"He came from the back, behind the stage," says Guy.
"how the hell, with security up the wazzoo," says Fil, more angry than coherent, "and he gets on stage..."
"And on top of it all," laughs backing singer Katie, "I lost my rose!"
Guy, who carries a little camcorder with him a lot of the time, leaving it running both on stage and backstage, has managed to catch, incredibly, the actual moment of the attack on video. They all crane over the little screen to see the assailant racing across from left ot right, truly a man possessed. "I've never seen anyone attacked on stage," says Guy. "And I've been to hundreds of gigs."
Franksy arrives. The police have got the main, he tells them. He's a complete nutter, apparently. Thinks Rob is impersonating Robbie and the real Robbie Williams is somewhere else. Guy plays back the tape.
"F***in' 'ell!" goes Franksy.
"It's just horrible, innit?" says Guy. "So horrible I can't bear to watch it. I've seen it about ten times," he adds illogically.
When Rob has finally collected himself, he emerges into the corridor. Security guards Marv and Pompey are now in tears. "Please, guys," Rob asks the documentary camera and sound men, who have started filming and recording again. He waves them away and they back off as he goes to throw his arms around Pompey. The Falklands veteran and the superstar hug like brothers.
Ten minutes later Rob appears through the shower area that links his and the male dressing rooms at the back. He's fully dressed in black woolly hat and puffa jacket. The general chatter hushes. Spliffs go down behind armchair arms and wine glasses slide to the floor. Rob nods and smiles silently as he looks round at his band, those close to him, those he loves, he realises now more than ever, his friends. "Are you lot going to Paris tonight?" he asks. They are. He nods again, thoughtfully. "I might come with you," he says. "I'm not sure I want to stay in Stuttgart tonight."
No, they tell him. They love him too. Come with us on the bus. Get out of Stuttgart. Leave the bloody place behind. He nods again and heads off thoughtfully into the corridor.
"I couldn't believe his reaction about getting back up and finishing the show," says David later. "Old Robbie would have been furious and run away. This new Rob actually became this caring man that was much more concerned about everybody else not being upset. It was a turning point. The boy became a man. I was gobsmacked with pride, actually. I was in tears. I thought, 'here he is, he's become a man.' "

~Robbie Williams - Somebody Someday
:: sh 11:12:00 PM [+] ::
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oh, oh! to add to yesterday, I just got out of somerset mrt, was walking towards Heeren... then i saw this pretty-mixedlooking-lady walking in front of me. then, i stared again. it was Denise! Denise Kellers! *blink* then she just walked past. she was either heading somerset mrt or specialists' shopping centre. but then again, she is very pretty then. :) wanted to approach her. ah well..

and while coming out of Cathay Cineleisure, i saw Dell (lianne!! this time i'm sure. she was in her RGS uniform lol). didn't approach her either. what was i to say? "hey dell, was wondering if u remembered a girl named Annabelle u met 2 years back?" *blink*
:: sh 5:39:00 AM [+] ::
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chk this out.

i was fooled once again. *growl* i saw that date. oct 15th. i RAN to grab it, and it was yesterday's. i'm gonna charge against that site someday. *mutter*

kay, see that list of possible books i might borrow below? lol, strike them all out. i borrowed robbie's somebody someday. pretty cool stuff, still in the midst of reading that. also, a book called "the song of an innocent bystander" and "ties that bind, ties that break". seem pretty cool.. hmm... and, met my pri sch friend (p3-p6) at the library. lol.

still lurve my layout. :p
:: sh 3:05:00 AM [+] ::
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I just want to feel safe in my own skin
I just want to be happy again
I just want to feel deep in my own world
but I'm so lonely I don't even want to be with myself anymore
On a different day if I was safe in my own skin
then I wouldn't feel so lost and so frightened
But this is today and I'm lost in my own skin

And I'm so lonely I don't even want to be with myself anymore

I just want to feel safe in my own skin
I just want to be happy again

~Dido - Honestly OK


think i'll run down to the library later on. i don't believe this. i'm bored. probably get a book on yoga or meditation and a book on html to do a nice layout, (Hey i won't change that soon yet, cos i'm still smitten with my current layout), and.... *shrug* a guitar one perhaps. and of course a story bk. *yawn*
:: sh 10:07:00 PM [+] ::
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Daily Double
1. Are you going to be buying Clay Aiken's debut album?
*grin* i'm trying to win it desperately from power98, but if i don't win it, i'll get it, after i save enough money again cos i've just saved enough for shopping *grin* whee. i miss shopping!!

2. Post one of your favourite pictures.

*grin* that's mineeeee!
:: sh 7:07:00 AM [+] ::
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erm. i still haven't found out how i could get my enetation to appear. *mutter* but i love my site's layout now. whee. *grin* didn't take me more than an hour. *shocked* :p

anyways my papers are yes, finally over. finally. finally finally finally. *nod nod* *jumps for joy* but then again i'm terribly tired. physically and mentally. *yawn* don't ask me why. i haven't got a clue either.

but anyway, met up with yu pei and eunice today. apologies you2, for being a bit inactive. i'm tired. yes i'm tired. not bored of any of u. :) sorry!!
p/s: eunice's an insane maniac. ;p oops. lol. but she's hilarious, nonetheless. very good story-maker/teller too. *rolls eyes*

*yawn* think i'll sleep early tonight. hopefully manage a 10-hr sleep *grin* it's been long since i had that! =)
pps: still considering if i should get a host. *ponders*
:: sh 6:58:00 AM [+] ::
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bummer. i can't get the enetation to work. *grumble* we'll have to make do with this for a while till my bro stops bugging the comp. *innocent smiles*
:: sh 4:46:00 AM [+] ::
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i'm bored. i'm very bored. i'm extremely bored. i want tomorrow to end quick. within a snap! *snaps* oh shoot. *sulks* my last 2 papers are tomorrow and i'm not studying. i'm in no mood. i'm tooooo excited. i don't even have school from wednesday to friday! what a long wkend i'm gonna have. gonna shop. till i drop. i can't wait. i can't wait i can't wait. lol. i'm just killing time basically. i wan exams to be overrrrr this minute, u hear me?!?! *goes insane*
:: sh 6:26:00 AM [+] ::
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Friday Five
1. Do you watch sports? If so, which ones?
Yea! a couple of soccer matches for the past few weekends, and sometimes, softball/baseball (i can't quite differentiate 'em actually). I just caught a softball/baseball match earlier and whoa! this fella hit the ball to the spectators! a comfirmed home-runs for them all!!!

2. What/who are your favorite sports teams and/or favorite athletes?
erm, no particular favourite, really. but the soccer matches i watch are mostly the EPL ones... with man u/liverpool/arsenal yeah.

3. Are there any sports you hate?
erm *thinks* i don't really hate any. but i hate watching golf. *yawn*

4. Have you ever been to a sports event?
not really. unless school ones are counted heh. :p

5. Do/did you play any sports (in school or other)? How long did you play?
erm, i played for my class in softball before, (we emerged 1st runner-up! whee!) only once. for 2 matches. lol. not like i helped a lot, but then again. heh. that's...about..all for competitions...

sometimes my friends and i play badminton too.. it was on a weekly basis for a while...till the exams came! for a couple of hours. duh. :p
:: sh 4:32:00 AM [+] ::
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it's the best record so far! I studied last night from 9.30pm to 2am. *blinks* yea that's 4.5hours straight. and i only managed to cover about 7 chaps of science. *blink* another half the book to go! think i'd have to do the same tonight. dang. well, there were a lot of distractions in between nonetheless. double j on the radio (power98) was my company for the night. and, i had short breaks in between, to have my supper, to reorganise my notes, my files, etc. can't believe i studied from 9.30 - 2! im insane. i've gone nuts. save me someone!
:: sh 9:49:00 PM [+] ::
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currently on hiatus, if u haven't realised. lol will be back on tuesday. damn the exams. the maths today was alright nonetheless *grin*
:: sh 5:50:00 AM [+] ::
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told my mum i had a headache at school today and she went all on about my late nights, either on the comp, on tv or on the phone. *growl* shan't tell her next time. sheesh.

anyway, today's english paper was pretty crappy... =p shall mention next time. off to study.
:: sh 1:31:00 AM [+] ::
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It was Children's Day yesterday, and our teacher didn't go back on her words! She did give us chocolates afterall! It was so sweet of her to still think us as children! *delighted smile* That makes it our history and literature teachers!

While I was carrying out my AV duty in the General Office at school yesterday morning, my friend and I saw our principal's son, who's in nursery, and he didn't have to go to school. Lucky him! Suddenly, I started feeling a little nostalgic. I used to look forward to Children's Day just so that I could skip a day's lessons, even though I didn't know how to appreciate the time given on that day to celebrate or somewhat. I took them all for granted, but I wouldn't care much. I was still a child then. Now I'm a youth. Funny how 2 years could mean so much. It means if you get to enjoy another 24hours at home, if you haven't realised. Guess it'd come in handy right now, especially when exams are just around the corner. Wait a minute, let me rephrase that. It's just tomorrow! I'm not feeling a thing about it and it's utterly strange. I'm supposed to feel the stress!

Our art teacher told us something inspiring, something to think about, today. It was surprisingly regarding US's ex-president, Abraham Lincoln. I was shocked to hear about how many times he had failed, and yet he managed to say something about it being a slip, not a fall, thus he managed to keep trying again until he succeeded.
For example, in 1818, his mother died.
In 1828, his sister died.
In 1832, he joined an election but lost.
In 1833, the store he set up with his partner failed, leaving him in debt.
In 1835, his partner died, increasing his debt. His love interest died then too.
In 1836, he suffered a severe depression.
In 1837, he proposed to another lady and she turned him down.
In 1849, he made an appeal at a court and was unsuccessful.
In 1850, his son died.
In 1851, his father died.
In 1855, he failed to be chosen as U.S. Senator.
In 1859, he tried again, but lost.
Only in 1860, did he get elected to be the president.

I think there were more, but I can't care less to continue searching. :p But, it brings my attention to wonder how someone could fail so many times and still have the determination to try again and again. Then, she brought out a point about many people being trapped by their own feelings and thoughts. They keep thinking, "no, I can't do it. I'm going to fail. I'm dead". Sure, I admit I do that plenty of times too. I can encourage people anywhere, any place, anytime. It's just tough to encourage myself. But this session made me open my mind. I could try many things. I could do a lot, if only I gave myself the opportunity to.
I could.
I can.
I shall.
I will.
I must.
:: sh 3:15:00 AM [+] ::
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